I made this video from an interview I participated in, on a nationally syndicated radio show. Because I am not able to use identifying information of the show, I removed the interviewers voice. Still, he asked incredible questions (which are presented to the viewer). This is my best brief explanation on the diverse topic of gaslighting.
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Ross Rosenberg M.Ed., LCPC, CADC, CSAT, is the owner of Self-Love Recovery Institute. He is a psychotherapist, educator, expert witness and author. Ross is known globally for his expertise in codependency (Self-Love Deficit Disorder™), Pathological Narcissism, Narcissistic Abuse and Trauma Treatment. His book, “The Human Magnet Syndrome” sold over 110,000 copies and are translated into nine languages. Ross’s YouTube channel has amassed over 17million video views and 185K subscribers. He is a keynote speaker and educator who has presented educational workshops in 30 States/70 cities and abroad. Ross has been regularly featured on national TV and radio.
#gaslighting #narcissisticpersonalitydisorder #narcissism #MentalHealth
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The best description of Gaslighting and why a Co Dependant is needed
My dad divorced 3x and hated child support so much he sent my siblings and i a packet showing all of the money he paid. It’s easy to talk about my dad and his abusive childhood but i am just now diving into the possibility that my mom’s childhood wasn’t as wonderful as what was presented. It’s not about blame as much as it’s about me healing so I don’t pass any of this bs onto my sweet 3 year old daughter.
This systematic manipulation does not have to be towards the NEGATIVE! It can also be towards the POSITIVE! "
How do they see themselves as better ? They are so insecure and hate themselves. And they know they are ugly inside … so how do they see themselves as grandiose ? How is that possible… they are jelous and envy others. Makes no sense .
My ex-husband was so good at it that I forgot how to cook. Every meal was a nightmare, and it was one of his best weapons in our marriage. Another favorite things to do to me was to wake me up between 2 and 3 am for "Reality check." He would rage and monologue for a couple of hours about my deteriorating mental health, my failures as a wife, and covering the subject of how I was slowly killing our 2 children. He was brutal. It wasn't called Gaslighting then though. He would justify his behavior with the phrase "If you keep them on their toes you have their attention. When you have their attention you have everything you need to break them.
Also, when someone would ask why he would not get me something for mother's day, he would tell them that "I deny my wife nothing. I just see that she doesn't get it." And he would say mean, spiteful things about me to others while we were out and then pull them into it and laugh at their hurtful comments. While I was standing there. He would tell the children that mommy probably loved them, she just didn't love them enough to get of the narcotics. ( It was 2 xanax my mother gave me to ease the panic attacks his treatment was triggering. I was never smart enough, pretty enough, loving enough or stable enough. He used 'always' and 'never' all the time. Everything he would say would be an exaggeration. Two xanax was an addiction to narcotics. I was never anxious I was overdramatic and looking for sympathy. I was a bad housekeeper, an awful wife and a criminally neglectful mother. It could have gone on forever if it weren't for his best friend. He had been vicious for days, accusing me of stealing almost a thousand dollars from his account ( never ours, cause I would steal his hard earned money) and swuirriling it away to give to that backwardassed family of mine who wouldn't give me the time of day if I didn't. After an hour long tirade about what a sneaktheif I was I was broken. I was numb and was panicking. As they were leaving to find some 'normal' people who were worthy of his attention, his best friend stopped in front of me and said, ' he has a debit card you know? It took me all night, but I went over every bank statement for the previous year and underlined every debt transaction and discovered that the one stealing his money. To the tune of better than 600 dollars a month. When I sat the statements in front of him and pointed out that he was the thief not me, he said he had never said such a thing. I needed to put the drugs down and pay attention to my family. While he was abused for just asking a harmless question. Look at how petty and ungrateful I was towards him.
During sex my ex told me randomly they miss me working out. Then I ask if she thought I was fat. She replied, "no no no, I just miss the way you look when you were leaving and they way you look when you get back" Planting a personal narrative for me during sex that i have a weight problems. My ex use to always order me extra food when not asked for or upgrade size when specifically asked not too. Hardest mental f*** I have been through is dating a narcissistic psychopath.
It used to take me a couple months to read women.I can see the changes in 2 weeks now Everything seems normal and great in the beginning.
There tools of the Devil. Like Commies
"…in their own little bubble, secret bubble, feeling like they are a top of the world, in which they are God-like. Where they can control people and make people love and admire them, and keep keep them trapped without outside interference. […] you created this bubble where you have your little zombie slave who has been inculcated or manipulated to believe they are someone else…"
I felt like this little zombie slave so much in one of my last relationships. Stuck in a bubble I can't escape for long.